Ctbc Template Exercise

Goal: To write in Alan Paton's style by replacing his words. ._.

Original

1. There is a lovely road that runs from Ixopo into the hills.
2. These hills are grass-covered and rolling, and they are lovely beyond any singing of it.
3. The road climbs seven miles into them, to Carisbrooke; and fromt here, if there is no mist, you look down on one of the fairest valleys of Africa.
4. About you there is grass and bracken and you may hear the forlorn crying of the titihoya, one of the birds of the veld.
5. Below you is the valley of the Umzimkulu, on its journey from the Drakensburg to the sea; and beyond the river, great hill after great hill; and beyond and behind them, the mountains of Ingeli and East Griqualand.
6. The grass is rich and matted, you cannot see the soil.
7. It hols the rain and the mist, and they seep into the ground, feeding the streams in every kloof.
8. It is well-tended, and not too many cattle feed upon it; not too many fires burn it, laying bare the soil.
9. Stand unshod upon it, for the ground is holy, being even as it came from the Creator.
10. Keep it, guard it, care for it, for it keeps men, guards men, cares for men.
11. Destroy it and man is destroyed.

Student Examples

Valentina Rabinovich, "Cry, the Dirty Sidewalk"

1. There is a star-paved street that runs along Hollywood and Vine.
2. The stars are gold-plated and dirty, but they are lovely beyond any singing of it.
3. Tom Cruise's star shines several meters into them, at star number 6912; and on it, there is not dust, you look down on one of the most kissed stars on the Walk of Fame.
4. About you there are prostitutes and drag queens and you may see the masculine physiques of the cross-dressers, one of them looks like Britney Spears.
5. Before you is the stretch of Hollywood Boulevard, with its star of Johnny Depp; and beyond and around the corner, gold star after gold star; and beyond and next to that, the stars of Marilyn Monroe and Tom Hanks.
6. The musicians are poor and matted, you cannot see their faces.
7. They play the songs and the poems, and they sleep on the ground, hoping the agents will see them.
8. The pentagrams are poorly tended, for way too many feet trample them; too many scratches disfigure them, peeling off the paint.
9. Look down on them, for the street is legendary, being as it came from the artist Oliver Weismuller in 1958.
10. Kneel next to them, touch them, kiss them, for Keanu Reeves was there, kneeled there, touched there.
11. Ignore them and showbusiness is ignored.

Diana Lee, "Hell"

1. There is a long dank road that runs from Purgatory into the fires.
2. These fires are searing and snapping, and they are frightening beyond any description of it.
3. The road snakes deep within its fiery pits; and from there, if one looks below, you look down upon the most sinister place in the universe.
4. About you there are lost souls like yu and yuo may hear the tortured scream of a fallen angel, another damned soul amongst you.
5. Below you is the Valley of Sufferings, on its journey from the River of Death to the Bloody Sea; and beyond and behind this river, great cliff after great clif; and beyond and behind them, the dim light of heaven.
6. The ground is hot and dry, you cannot see any life.
7. It drains you of your love and desire, and it seeps into the ground, buried deep beneath the soil.
8. It is not tended, and too many feet trod upon it; the fires burn it, laying bare the emptiness.
9. Stand scarred upon it, for the ground is wicked, being even as it came from the Devil.
10. Damage it, kill it, hurt it, for it damages men, kills men, hurts men.
11. Destroy it, and you are free.